15 REASONS WHY BEER IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN

When I was just an easy going and naughty slab on school my mother bought or rather gave me a blue loose T-Shirt with grotesquely funny prints in front of it. It says “15 REASONS WHY BEER IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN” followed by the reasons since when you pop a beer in a party till the month long that you enjoy it.

Every now and then I got to have a bit of stardom shrill every time some one calls me to check my shirt or otherwise few of them gather in front of me grinning at what that cartooned two-pieced woman is doing in my shirt.

Just wondering where that T-Shirt now. I still loved that blue-color faded shirt.


1. A beer doesn’t get jealous when you grab another beer. A bottle of beer even encourages you to douse a couple more or nosedive on the floor or pee pee on your pants till you get enough.

2. When you go to a bar you know you can always pick up a beer. Obviously!

3. A beer won’t get upset if you come home and have beer on your breath. A beer doesn't have sense of smell.

4. You don’t have to wine and dine a beer. But beer can be used to dine a woman.

5. If you pour a beer right you’ll always get good head. Just the beer not the bottle.

6. Hangovers go away. Only after few 'bowels' out at the toilet.

7. When you’re finished with a beer the bottle is still worth 5 cents. Here in the Philippines it costs P6.00.

8. You don’t have to wash a beer before it tastes good. But sometimes I use it to wash my pillow at night.

9. A beer always goes down easy. But the drinker oftentimes goes down rough on the floor.

10. You can share a beer with your friends. After sharing beers, the secrets' next.

11. Beer is always wet. I could hardly imagine a dry beer or at least 'ice candy' beer.

12. You always know you are the first one to pop a beer. And the first one to pop a beer mate (pulutan) on the table, perhaps finish it.

13. A frigid beer is a good beer. Precisely, but not a beer frozen to the bones. I don't know how do we gonna drink that.

14. You can have more than one beer and not feel guilty. You'll just get dizzy straight down the canal.

15. You can enjoy a beer all month long. No, you'll enjoy a beer as long as all of the above is true!

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